Monday, February 11, 2019

As the year wanes on, I find myself more and more needing an outlet.  Since I already have this one, let's take advantage.

I was asked a couple weeks ago to share in my Sunday School class what it's like to be a champion for students at my job in about 5 minutes.  I agreed, knowing the instant I hit send that it would be very difficult for me to do so.  Strange as it may sound knowing that I'm a teacher, I'm actually not all that comfortable with public speaking.  I write much better than I speak, and I stay more focused that way, too.  So after a few days of contemplating how to go about this, I decided to just write it down, and be honest with my group that I was much more comfortable sharing in writing than I would be just speaking.  I was told after the fact that I should write more often.  And I should.  But that's hard when you pour your heart and soul fully into who knows how many hours "on the job" a week, and then pour just as much heart and soul into fully being wife and mom.  There's just not much left to pour out for myself.  However, being at the point where I might break if I don't, here I sit.

So, this is what I shared, along with a few tears, with my class (with a few minor edits/additions, because that's what writers do).  And what I try to keep telling myself not just daily, but second by second as I muddle through this year that feels so......relentless.

"Students who are loved at home, come to school to learn, and students who aren't, come to school to be loved." --Nicholas A. Ferroni

Most research shows that it takes 5 positive comments to make up for 1 negative.  Really think about that, 5:1.  And that's not just for kids, it applies to us adults too.  Sometimes that ratio can seem overwhelming.  Actually, it's overwhelming all the time.  Especially now that I'm a parent.  I know that my child gets the encouragement he needs at home.  But I also know that we all have our days where there may be very little positive interaction, or no interaction at all.  We're all human, and in that short time between school getting out and bedtime, there's a lot that can happen to direct our attitudes away from the positive.  Which is why my classroom is my mission field.  And why even though it's not "supposed" to be, and is frowned upon by most higher-ups, my focus is always RELATIONSHIPS FIRST.

"The way we talk to our children becomes their inner voice." --Peggy O'Mara

I take my job very seriously.  But not the part of my job you'd expect.  Oh sure, I work hard to teach the academics, but there's a big difference between teaching curriculum and teaching students.  I believe my job, my responsibility to our future generations, is to be their cheerleader.  Some days it's exhausting.  Some days it's a struggle to keep positive interaction the focus.  Some days I suck at it.  But every morning, I get up and remind myself that these little people who will one day be our politicians, doctors, lawyers, teachers, church leaders, and whatever else they can dream to be, deserve as much love, confidence, and emotional support as I can pack into one day.  I mean, they spend more time with me than anywhere else.  And I want my child to be getting that same amount of love, confidence, and emotional support from his teachers.  Because we are all in this together, we all have a stake in this future, and I'd rather it not be miserable.  And because every child that passes through my classroom should leave it with a stockpile of encouragement to combat the negative the world will constantly throw at them.  Constantly.  And relentlessly.  I know this from experience, because it happened just today.  And my stockpile is low right now.  The world doesn't care if you have someone replenishing your fuel.  So I have to keep doing it for them, no matter the cost, so they never get to empty.

I'm very blessed to be in a school where many of my coworkers also see the importance of being cheerleaders for our students.  And because of this I have a great system in place to allow the interactions that lead to encouragement of our students.  We showcase their strengths and talents to the community.  We allow them to take responsibilities in their class and their school.  We show them how to monitor and analyze their academic progress.  We empower them to achieve success by teaching them emotional and social skills along with their academics.  But even in such a wonderful workplace, there can be days...weeks...phases, where it's just tough.  Almost too tough.  But then I remember.  The blessing of seeing our students speak in front of crowds, seeing their excitement over achieving their goals, hearing them say these skills have made them a better person, or even just having them stop by for a quick hug every morning is what keeps me going.  On those tough days (and there have been a lot lately), when it seems like I've got no more encouragement left to give, when I feel like I've failed because I snapped, God sends me one of those blessings to keep me going.  Something as simple as a student thrilled to wave at me in the hall or the shy smile they shoot my way when they can read that word.  That's my why.  It's not easy.  But it is worth it.